June 2024
Let’s Address the Elephant in the Room
Have you ever asked yourself if it is ok to talk about sex with your therapist? The answer to that question is absolutely yes. Therapists have their own realm of expertise; every therapist knows their limits and boundaries regarding those topics. However, sex is a healthy and common thing that most humans have in common. Now, you may ask yourself why this is important. Why should I investigate this part of my life? There is no simple answer to the complexity of sex. However, sex cannot only boost your self-esteem and confidence, but it can also increase your physical health.
December 2023
You Are Someone You Need To Love, Too.
By: Kayli Beaty, LMFT Associate, Supervised By Dr. Mark White, LMFT-S Has the hand you’ve been dealt in life started to feel heavy? Have you found yourself working to please those around you even if it means constantly keeping your emotions and thoughts harbored? Here is a gentle reminder: You are someone you need to love, too. Deriving from Mark 12:31, people are called to “love thy neighbor as thyself.” What would it look like if you truly loved those around you as you loved yourself? Would they feel safe, connected, and satisfied, or would they feel ridiculed, judged, and
February 2023
From Discovery Through Recovery
There are many circumstances in life in which it is intuitive to determine what actions to take to resolve a problem. Discovering that a trusted life partner is emotionally or sexually involved with another person or that they are involved in a sexually compulsive behavior like pornography use isn’t one of those circumstances. As individuals and couples, we are designed for intimate connections, with life commitment and marriage being the most intimate. I like to explain it using the concept of power. We have in us an inborn, God-given, DNA-structured design and desire to be the most powerful intimate connection
December 2021
The Ever-Present Calculator: A Message on Eating Disorders
By: Kayli Spears, MFT-Intern A 2020 research article on body shape ideals in the United States yielded that women “reported conflicting pressures to be thin while also having the desire to have curvier and fuller bodies” (Hunter et al., 2020, pp. 240). There has been yet another shift in the perception of the “perfect body” in the United States over the last couple of years. Similar to the changing of the seasons and the trends that come and go, society’s ideal body fluctuates as well. How can anyone win with what is “in” or “popular” when standards are constantly shifting?
October 2021
The Reality of Chronic Illness: An Invitation to Leave the Mask at Home
By: Kayli Spears, MFT-Intern “You look normal.” “Why don’t you ever want to do anything?” “You are so flakey.” “Why are you always tired?” “Can’t you just take some medicine?” If you are an individual with autoimmune conditions or chronic pain, you will likely find the first few statements all too familiar. God has designed our minds and bodies to have open and intricate lines of communication with one another. When an individual experiences chronic stress, fear, anxiety, or depression, those emotions have the potential to manifest into physical ailments in the body. When autoimmune conditions are present, the mind
April 2020
What Effect is the Quarantine Having on My Relationship with My Partner?
Well like a lot of things in life the answer is that it depends, and I would like to put my thoughts and opinions out for those interested. I’ll start with being quarantined together. I know for some this has been an enhancement for their relationship and for some it has caused significant strife. In the case of the enhancement, it is due to lessened stress at work (furlough) for one person in the couple and therefore more attention being able to be given to the partner still working and that partner’s emotions. In the case of the increase in
March 2020
Progress vs. Perfection
I had an interesting conversation today about progress versus perfection. This is a concept that gets discussed often in my office and I would like to expound on it; also I found the following, awesome, quote by Voltaire: When we think of progress, what comes to mind? I think of steady advancement toward a goal. Whether that goal is a mental health accomplishment, a wood working project, a vehicle restoration, a scrap book, or recovery, progress is an incremental move toward a goal. Perfection is what? I think it is an ideal, it is something that we hold in our mind as
A Few Things to Know About Premarital Counseling
At its most basic, premarital counseling or education is a chance to sit down with a trained professional to discuss life after the wedding day. Most of the premarital couples I have worked with have numerous questions about roles, responsibilities, sex, money, work, kids, extended family, video games, social media, conflict, fighting fair…and the list could go on. It is important to note that these are couples who on the cusp of marriage, very much in love, and coming from a place of great commitment, yet they still have these questions. Let me assure you, it is okay to have the questions!
