November 2024
Privacy, Secrecy, Transparency, and Authenticity: What does all this have to do with Good Faith?
By Tim White Disclaimer! I am writing this blog from the perspective that the partners in this scenario are working toward connecting, resolving, rebuilding trust, and healing/forgiving and that the person who has gone outside of the agreed boundaries in sex or communication* is genuinely showing up in good faith to work through the process. I am in no way proclaiming that a betrayed partner should stay in a relationship that is continuing to be deceitful, manipulative, coercive, or abusive. Further, let’s address * the really long but kinder way to say betrayer, cheater, liar, or two-faced %@*&^%#$!!@#$! So, please
Therapists Need Therapy Too
By Adrienne Rains, LMFT-Associate Supervised by Dr. Mark White As therapists, we carry a lot of things with us in our hearts, minds, and souls. We need a place to get those things out. When in school or newly licensed we have a supervisor that allows us to express ourselves in a safe place. We are constantly talked to about self-care and what our plan is, but what happens when we are finished with school and supervision and on our own in private practice and our self-care falls by the wayside? This is when therapists need to turn to other
July 2024
6 Principles of Sexual Health
By: Tim White, MA, LMFT, LSOTP, ASAT, APTT, CST Student Preface I have found the concept of sexual health principles (Braun-Harvey & Vigoritio, 2015) fascinating and helpful in practice over the last few months. As many of my clients know, I am a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist. As many of my clients know, I am a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist. This certification has given me the insight and ability to help many clients struggling with their sexual behavior. While I am grateful for this training, I have resolved to go further than just helping people with problematic sexual behavior and
June 2023
Motherhood is hard
By Adrienne Rains LMFT - Associate (TX) and AMFT (NM) Supervised by Dr. Mark White I’m going to say what we are all thinking, motherhood is hard. You go into motherhood thinking about all of the sweet things that a baby will bring into your life. Like love, joy, cute outfits, setting up the nursery just so, etc. But once your little one is in your arms you learn about the sleepless nights, the crying, the spit up (or in some cases projectile vomit), the poop, being peed on, but mostly you learn that you as the mother can lose
March 2020
Progress vs. Perfection
I had an interesting conversation today about progress versus perfection. This is a concept that gets discussed often in my office and I would like to expound on it; also I found the following, awesome, quote by Voltaire: When we think of progress, what comes to mind? I think of steady advancement toward a goal. Whether that goal is a mental health accomplishment, a wood working project, a vehicle restoration, a scrap book, or recovery, progress is an incremental move toward a goal. Perfection is what? I think it is an ideal, it is something that we hold in our mind as
Your Sense of Self
Your sense of self. What is it? Who is it? How do you know? What is it based on? Is it simply a list of all the roles and attributes that you have? If that is the case then I am a husband, driver, father, sighted-person, son, homed person, brother, right-handed person, friend, smeller of delicious scents, veteran, and therapist. Some of these may seem silly, but consider the loss of one or more of these roles or attributes. Anosmia is the loss of the sense of smell, the only reason I remember this is because of a Scrubs
Self-Care, Not Just Chocolates and Bubble Baths
Have you ever had one of those weeks where you just can’t give any more? Your tank is running on empty, and it’s only Thursday. You tell yourself that you only have to make it two more days until the weekend. Then your boss informs you that you’re going to have to come in on Saturday to finish up a project. Then daycare calls and tells you your child is throwing up and has a fever. Then your spouse informs you that they forgot to mention that their parents are coming over for dinner on Sunday. Suddenly, the weekend you’ve
